Sunday, September 1, 2013

Day 1: Relationship Building

Whoa! I blasted you with a kissing photo on day one! Booyah!!!

This is on the ski-lift at the MN state fair from last month. We thought we'd get an early start on our perfect month of relationship building by displaying our affection publicly, then taking a selfie so that we could display it even MORE publicly all over again. This is the start of some major relationship growth. I can feel it. (In fact, where is that hottie? I want to kiss him more). Just kidding. Just trying to weed out those who are too weak to read this month.

Tonight was a nice start to a perfect month. We did this sit-outside-after-Lilly's-asleep thing once last month and decided that it was really nice. I was amazed at that time, and again, tonight at how much Matt has to say! For whatever reason, when I ask him about his day at dinner, he gives me the 30 second version, but when we're sitting out under the stars, I hear about his excitement, fears, anxiety,'s really fun.

Tonight he started things off by asking about how I'm feeling about next week. I described to him a few things that will make it an exciting week for me (Monday Matt stays home since it's Labor day, Tuesday I watch three two year olds, Wednesday is work, Thursday is our 20 week ultrasound, etc) and then I asked him about his coming week. He went on to tell me all about his current project with his research group and how things are progressing, his final class that starts on Wednesday, his thoughts about his research and progress in his PhD in general, etc. It was really nice and I realized that I need to make more of an effort to listen and understand what is going on in Matt's work-life. When we were first married, I could explain his research about as well as he could. I've lagged a bit on giving it the attention necessary for me to grasp it. It is really fun to hear him talk about what he's learning, though, and I do feel closer to him when I know he can talk to me about it and I will understand what he's saying.

Announcing: September's Perfect Month!!!

Welcome September! This is the first September in a LONG Time that I haven't been in school. And as much as I love school, it does feel kind of awesome to not be gearing up for another semester.

Sometimes it's hard for me to think of a topic that I care about enough to commit myself to a perfect month, but this month's goal is one that I have been thinking about for a long time and I feel extremely committed to and excited about.

I think cutting my hulu/netflix viewing down prepped me for this month by helping me realize how much time I have in a day and how I can better use it. This month, I've decided to spend time every day working on my relationship with Matt.

Here're the specifics:
  • We will spend time daily talking, just the two of us, after Lilly goes to bed. If the weather's nice, we'll grab our camping chairs and sit outside. (We'll open Lilly's bedroom window, lock the apartment, and sit outside within earshot of her window in case she needs us). If the weather's not so great, we'll do this in the living room on the couch.
  •  We will have a date every single week. A specific, planned, intentional date.
  • At least two of the 4 dates will be sans Lilly with a babysitter watching her 

Basically, we want to be these guys.

We had three awesome road trips last month and I'm happy to report that Lillian is now a pro. Matt and I had such a fun time talking with each other, I thought 'why can't we do this all the time?' Minus the 600 mile drive, of course.

Also, Matt and I hang out basically every moment that we're not working and often end up doing impromptu "dates" rather than really setting a specific time aside for US. I suspect that having a night that is officially a "date" rather than a "let's get dinner out tonight because I don't feel like cooking" will feel different. Like the good old days when I would dress up cute and wear body spray and all that adorable date-prep stuff. (Though I doubt that prep experience will be the same without 110-ers).

The last item is a bit radical. We probably average a date without Lilly every 4 months, if that. I'm kinda pumped about that particular part of this goal.

Alright, I'll keep you posted. Feel free to ask awkwardly personal relationship questions because I'm about to be a LOVE GURU.